Getting to O.K.

Getting to O.K.

For as long as I can remember, I have been a relentless optimist.

No matter what situation I am in – no matter how insurmountable the task may seem, my mantra is *almost* always:

“Everything is going to be O.K.”

I have been encouraged in this belief by it being proved right time and time again. Once I had got onto this line of thinking, in every case I could think of it really had turned out O.K. in the end.

But of course while we live nothing really ever ‘ends’ – the chapters just keep on coming. Eventually we find ourselves with another set of complications, another set of insurmountable tasks and a situation in which we feel like there will be no end to the problems.

“Everything is going to be O.K.”

The trick, however, is getting to O.K.

It’s all very well to be optimistic, but it doesn’t actually change the situation. It doesn’t take away all the things we are dreading having to face, deal with and resolve. It doesn’t take away the complications which haven’t even hit us yet.

In fact, a friend suggested that in this regard pessimism is in fact a much easier option. That it’s easier to assume the worst is on its way and then do your best to avoid it happening – instead of imagining some rosy future and trying to somehow get there.

I can see their point, and it makes me want to clarify I think that being an optimist doesn’t mean being an optimist about everything. For me it’s bigger picture – I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, or that more terrible things aren’t potentially on the way.

What I’m saying is that if you’re so focused on what you don’t want to happen, you might get out of the mess you’re in, but where are you left? Being out of a bad situation doesn’t necessarily mean you’re set up to enter into a good one.

However, if you hold firm in the knowledge that everything is going to be O.K., you can start picturing just what “O.K.” looks like. You can begin to work out what steps might be required to get from here to there. You’ve turned a reactive response into a proactive one.

So, when you finally get out of the difficult situation you’re in, you’re at least a step closer to where you would really like to be.

You can get to O.K.

And then perhaps you can relax for a moment or two until you face your next set of challenges…

Magic Windows and Lots of Doors

Rock Band Webcast

As I type this, in another tab of my browser, two friends of mine in San Francisco are playing Rock Band. With a click of the mouse, I can switch over to watching them live through a little magic window. I can type messages to them, which they will nigh-on-instantly see and can then reply to. A part of me knows that in this day in age many would find that totally normal or even boring… but right now it still blows my mind.

The fact that I have friends in San Francisco at all is thanks to the fact my wife and I got involved in The Lost Ring earlier in the year. Six months of finding strangers to pick up envelopes all around the globe, emailing & google chatting with ficitional characters, and training for the international finals of a fictional lost ancient Olympic sport.

The fact I have the time to watch the rocking out at all is because I’ve left my job, feeling that it was time to pursue a new direction in my career. Unfortunately I ended up timing this to coincide with Christmas nearing and a Global Economic Downturn – if anything, businesses are laying people off at the moment, not hiring more. The upshot is that I’ve got more time on my hands than I have had for a long long time, and I’m slowly beginning to see the world beyond our apartment balcony as the truly open-ended sandbox game it is.

That said… the greater the “possibilities”, even more the need for ye olde Cognitive Purpose. Currently I’m trying to give myself at least two general tasks to achieve per day, plus one specific task per day for a larger project I’ve given myself. Alongside that I’m just trying to be the best house-hubby I can be…

Anyhow, where I was meaning to go with all this is that Reality seems to be rather amorphous these days. In my case, both in terms of my day-to-day reality AND in terms of what is possible. The friends in San Fran have taken a break from Rock Band to make some nachos and cocktails. It’s 7:22pm there now, on Saturday. Here in Wellington, it’s 4:22pm on Monday, and it’s about time I cleaned this place up before my wife gets home.

Once I click “Publish”, my other tasks will be done for the day.

Here goes…

Published in: on 24 November 2008 at 4:41 pm  Comments (1)  
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